im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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