Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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