we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize