Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
I see more hoeing in ur future
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