Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I love having hate sex.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize