I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
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No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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