Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize