Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I supernannyed him into submission
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
