Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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