It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize