You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize