My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
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She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
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Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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