It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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