it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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