She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
