Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Shitshow foam night was such a success
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
