My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
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