umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I just googled if crying burns calories
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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