Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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