Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
