The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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