Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
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Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
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we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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