quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
