I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
