i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
