the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
