He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
