We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I want her autograph on my taint
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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