You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
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