marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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