i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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