Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
