yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I love having hate sex.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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