I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
