Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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