shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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