Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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