I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
