I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
40s are totally the cure
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
