Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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