Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
