So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
