How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
