No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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