Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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