my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize