Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
