belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
