I love black thongs
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
