The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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